Our US Department of Education, Yours and Mine

Here is the mission of the U. S. Department of Education (from their website):

Our mission is to promote student achievement and preparation for global competitiveness by fostering educational excellence and ensuring equal access.

How many teachers go into the classroom each day with the goal of getting their students ready to be global competitive?

Instant Aptitude Test

Take this quick quiz to find out if you are prepared to work in a classroom, in the office of the U. S. Secretary of Education, or at the Business Roundtable in cooperation with the Aspen Institute.

  1. Lesson plans

a) are subject to instant change.

b) are a necessary guide to global competitiveness.

c) are a necessary guide to global competitiveness.

2. A parking place

a) should be ensured by contract, grievance procedures, and arbitration.

b) cannot be assigned without first completing a critical impact study of the neighborhood, its constituents, and its corporate overlay.

c) is evidence of federal overfunding of schools. Let them walk.

3. Phones

a) are necessary to contact parents and the American Civil Liberties Union.

b) are necessary for sending status memos to the media.

b. are necessary to contact Dial-a-Joke, Dial-a-Prayer, Off-track Betting

4. Pencils

a) are an endangered species.

b) must be ordered every April.

c) must not be purchased with federal funds, it being the provenance and privilege of every parent to exercise his/her/their inalienable privilege to provide her/his/their children with the writing implement of her/his/their choice.

5. Hallways

a) are where kids figure out how important things work.

b) are dens of iniquity that could be tamed if teachers would exercise their professional duty and patrol them.

c) should be returned to the hallowed state in which our forefathers founded them.

6. Sex Education

a) means explaining to an 8-year-old how people get sexually transmitted diseases.

b) means confiscating condoms.

c) is the provenance of parents and religious leaders.

7. Students opportunities to grow up to be good citizens are enhanced by

a) owning and enjoying books along with adequate housing and parents earning living wages.

b) scoring above the national norm on standardized achievement tests.

c) teachers who do their jobs.

8. Chastity, Cincinnatus, Clemens are an example of

a) alphabetical order.

b) things that provoke ulcers.

c) choice, content, and character education to build productive citizens.

9. The three basic components of education are

a) the kids, the teacher, and the books.

b) district goals, curriculum objectives for each grade, and evaluation procedures.

c) content, character, and competitiveness.

10. Things that must be taught:

a) reading and math

b) a nationally agreed-upon scope and sequence of necessary skills.

c) a direct line to character and competiveness.